Tonight, my family and I went to Outback for dinner. Boy did that stir up some memories. I wanted to break down and cry right in the middle of the restaurant. Back when my father was REALLY sick...in 1998, I bought my dad the last thing he ever ate outside of a hospital. Possibly one of the last things he ever ate at all. If I remember correctly, we didn't have a full and completed diagnosis....at least not to the extent of how bad his cancer was but we knew it was serious. He hadn't been able to have bowel movement for quite some time because of how badly the cancer was. It was completely blocking his bowels. Well, before he was that bad off, I had gone to outback with a friend and brought home the rest of my blooming onion and the dipping sauce. Dad polished it off for me and LOVED it!!! We (our family) never ate at places like that because we didn't have the money to but one I started working and making my own money, I would sometimes go with friends and bring home my extra's and anyone that knew my daddy knew that he LOVED him some food.
I don't really remember exactly how it all happened. It may have been fathers day...I'm not really sure. That entire year is a big blur to me. Some major events and holidays, I can't even tell you what we did. Especially after he passed away. But I decided I wanted to get my dad one last "treat" before he checked into the hospital. I drove across town and bought him a blooming onion with extra sauce and brought it back home. He sat in his recliner looking frail and ate it. So tonight, as my family sat at the table at Outback, enjoying our blooming onion, it was really bitter sweet for me. I think this is only the second time I've eaten there since my daddy died. The other time was with my husbands team at work. His co-workers and spouses were treated to lunch upon completion of their training. There was so much going on, I didn't even have time to think about memories that day but tonight, for just a little bit, I was back at the home I grew up in watching my dad enjoy one of his last treats ever. I miss you daddy!!!!
Wednesday, April 15, 2009
If you are wondering why I haven't been blogging so much, I can sum it up with 2 words. SICK KIDS!!! Between Calebs ear infections and Madi's asthma, it's been a doozie of a winter. Madison is now on breathing treatments daily. 1 every day and another as needed. Today was her first day doing 2 treatments and let me tell you....it's not easy getting an almost 1 yr old to sit still while steam goes up her nose for several minutes. She's actually doing better than I thought she would but it's still not an easy task to take on. Nothing scares me more than a child with breathing issues. At least now we have answers other than the ones from the quack of dr.'s that kept telling us, "oh, she's just one of those kids that keeps a cold all season." I've never seen a kid that just kept a cold all season and if they did, it's because they weren't being treated for the symptoms they were showing. For the most part, the breathing treatments have made a world of difference. We still have bad days but at least not every day is a bad day anymore. At least we've been able to resume some "normality" if there is such a thing. lol I will try and update more often. I will be having surgery on the 27th and might not be around much until after I recoup from that but I promise to try and be better! :)
Friday, April 3, 2009
SO, I was sitting here reflecting today and just realized that it is less than 3 weeks until my youngest turns 1! No one ever thought to tell me that when I became a mommy, time would fly in turbo charge speed. Not that it would have stopped me from becoming a mommy....this has been one of the most rewarding experiences in my life. I'm a bit saddened by the fact that I will never again experience all the baby stages. Madison has already been walking a month, she's drinking from sippy's, eating table food....everyday I'm seeing less and less baby and more toddler. I will never again get to smell that baby smell on a daily basis. I LOVE that smell! Well, unless it's the smell coming from the diaper. lol My oldest baby will be starting school this Fall. Full time, all day, 5 days a week! Though I LOVE The thought of not hearing her and Caleb fight like cats and dogs all day over who had what toy first and who it belongs to, I know I'm going to miss her like CRAZY!!!! I still can't help but think that this fall, I'll be taking her to school. Then one day, I'll wake and she'll be graduating highschool, then another day, I'll wake up and she'll be getting married and having babies of her own. So I say to those who have yet to start a family, and those that are just beginning your family, don't forget to drink in every minute of every day. Don't forget to give as many hugs and kisses as you can everyday. When they bring you weeds from your yard that to them, are beautiful flowers for mommy or daddy, cherish those weeds! When they draw or color you a picture, frame one from time to time. When they do or say something silly, write it down. I never did that and I'm now regretting it. I often find myself trying to remember something they did and all I come up with is a blank. Though I'm not great at writing the little things down, I'm queen of the camera! hahaha! My kids get their pictures taken on a daily basis because they are changing on a daily basis. Have you ever stopped and thought about how neet it would be to watch a plant or flower go through photosenthesis??? Well you can. Your very own flower that by the grace of God, you grew and nourished and brought into this world. Love it! Cherish it! and don't forget to RECORD it!!!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
I know I'm a little late in posting but the end of 2008 and beginning of 2009 has been one hectic time of the year. My wonderful husband surprised me with a trip home to see my family for Christmas. It was my first Christmas home in 7 years! It was wonderful. It was a LONG and QUICK trip but it was worth it. My kids had a blast as well. We've started trying to teach Olivia the TRUE meaning of Christmas. I'm not sure what to tell her about santa. She asks questions about why we can't fly with his reign deer. I won't lie to her. For now, I've been able to skirt around that topic and direct her to why we really celebrate Christmas. On another note, I don't want MY kid to be the one that tells her entire class that santa doesn't exist which is one reason I've avoided the topic all together. I remember my brother telling me and how heart broken I was but thinking back, I don't "think" my parents ever told me he was real but I still thought he was. My brother was the one that ruined alot of things for me but I love him anyway! It was great to get to see my grandparents and some of my aunts and uncles and cousins.
As for the new year, I proclaim this as a year of change. I know it is a year of change for our country but I want it to be a year of change for me personally and for my family. I'm on a quest to have our family eat more healthy, spend more time together, and have family quiet time and devotions together. I'm on a quest to learn to be more patient and more dedicated to my home and Church activities. This is a year to be better at what you do. I wish all of you a very happy, prosperous new year!
Well, the pageant is over. It was quite an exhausting day. Madi did not place but was, of course, the most beautiful baby there! Olivia was second runner up. I was very proud of her as this was her first pageant. I may be in trouble though. She keeps asking when she can be in another one. This isn't something I was looking to getting my girls into as I think there is to much emphasis placed on external beauty and I don't want that instilled in her at such a young age. Ever for that matter. I know she's beautiful and alot of others do to but I'd much rather encourage God given abilities. Be it sports, music, art, whatever she decides to pursue. BUT I have always said if it is something SHE wants to do, I would allow it. I will never become one of those pageant moms that live vicariously through their daughter and force them to do pageants and grow up far before there time. If Olivia can't win a pageant in her natural beauty, then that a flaw of any judge that would choose a winner based on fake beauty (makeup and fake hair.) I'm so glad she had a great time and I will allow her to participate again. Because I had 2 girls in it in back to back age divisions, I think I got more stage time than anyone else. LOL It was quite exhausting. I had to have Jeremy at the bottom of the steps to the stage so I could hand one off as I walked the other one up. HAHAHA. We all came home and napped. I don't have any good pics of Madi. Jeremy was the photographer so blame him. lol But I will include a picture of Olivia. My beautiful daughter. She did have on lip gloss and mascara so you could see her eyelashes. Other than that, she was all natur-el.
The kids and I just got through watching the inauguration of the 44th president of the united states. What a day in history. I never thought I'd live to see such a day. I'm proud of how far our country has come that a day like to day is possible. Yet I still feel such a heaviness. I'm sure if I could remember much about when Bush was sworn in, I had the same mixed feelings. Not quite on such a high level as today though as this is truely historical. It's like we know we need change but sometimes change is hard to accept. I pray that God give the new president to run our country as it needs to be ran and that positive things take place. I know he wasn't all our choice for president but we must pray for the leader of our country. I pray our country pulls together and not apart. I pray positive changes will take place for the future of my children and America's children. What a day! One that will forever change history. God Bless America!